DAY 219: Barcelona

Spain is keen on their bank holidays, or "puentes" as they call them here, so after only being back for four days of work, last week we had 3 days, or in my case, due to being ill one of them, 2. The plan had originally been to go to La Rioja with Liz, but with a lack of funds, Liz unfortunately had to bail and so I was left to decide what to do. Taking my mother´s advice, I spontaneously booked flights to Barcelona for 4 nights, as not only is it a great place to visit but I have a few friends from uni who live there. Unfortunately, about an hour after I had booked it though, I fell ill. I had a fever and a headache, was being sick and generally felt like I couldn´t move, once again, this is just a classic case of dehydration for me, but after then missing work the next morning and sleeping til about 3pm, I was fine to head to Barcelona Wednesday night.

Now I´ve never come across this before, but apparently airlines can overbook their seats?! How, is beyond me, as surely with technology these days stuff like that shouldn´t happen. However, I arrived at the airport in plenty of time, and when I went to check in they told me that my seat was on standby and that I might not be able to get on the plane. What the fuck? I was incredibly angry, and so storming through to the gate, I waited for everyone to board before they told me if I could get on or not. Luckily....I could, with the slight inconvenience of them then checking in my bag and a hefty 45 minute wait to get it back when arrived in Barcelona. However, there was Hannah waiting, all hugs and kisses, and as we hadn´t seen each other in months, there was a lot to catch up on. Once into the centre of town, we then headed to a restaurant, each buying a delicious steak, and of course, being in Spain, we were eating them at midnight!

Thursday was beach day and as my pale-skinned, heat.suffering, Scottish self, I felt I should be prepared, so I lathered on the factor 30 and bought about 4 bottles of water (which wasn´t even enough). Of course though, being me, my back went the colour of a lobster, and whilst everyone panicked and thought this was horrendous, I sadly just had to admit that I was "used to it"...sore skin from sunburn is now something, that especially living in Spain, I have become accostomed to. The beach was packed but very beautiful, and at about 6pm, Hannah and I decided to take ourselves off for a big jug of sangria....it´s a tough life. 

Now, if there is one thing that Madrid needs more of, it´s brunch places. There are several in Barcelona and they are so so cute and so so yummy. On Friday "brunch-time", I had a beautiful quinoa salad (my new favourite word as I don´t really know how to pronounce it) and Becky had these amazing pancakes which I´m sure I would have just inhaled if I had ordered them. It was such a cute wee cafe and served everything from donuts to cakes to salads to sandwiches to eggs benedict on waffles. Our next stop was Barcelona´s famous cathedral, La Sagrada Familia, and wow, it is impressive. First of all, it´s huge, and secondly, the sculpturing and artwork of it is just so intricate and beautiful. Every single part of it is so detailed. I didn´t actually go inside, cba with the queue, but it was lovely to see anyhow, of course with a few sneaky tourist snaps. Hannah and Becky then dropped me off at Izzy´s flat, who amazingly lives right next to it, and we chilled on her balcony in the sun with some good old cups of tea.....where of course, I burned even more.

That night, the four of us, plus 3 of Izzy´s friends, went to a really good tapas restaurant called La Tosca. Really good food for a really good price, and on top of that, very very cheap cocktails. I lost my Amaretto Sourz viginity (twice) and also indulged in a very strong caiprinha and some bitter lemon thing. It was fair to say that by the end of the night, we were all feeling a little bit "tipsy"...and then there was Izzy...pissed, with her classic sleepy drunken eyes on, and stripping off in the living room when we got home :P (Sorry Izzy, just thought I would mention that). However, being a morning person, she was up bright and early Saturday morning all dandy and chipper, whilst I reached for the bucket full of water and begged for some ibuprofen.

Saying that, it wasn´t long before I was sipping on the booze again as it was time to meet Vicky and we hadn´t seen each other in a long loooong time. Like our regular nights in Newcastle together, where we went to either Bar Berlise or Bar Ru on our favourite Ozzy Road, we ordered some nachos and potato skins with a mixture of cocktails, of which was mostly persuaded by our very friendly waiter. After that, now verging on obese, we went off to Parc Guell which is a park showing Gaudi´s main pieces of work through mozaics and beautiful buildings. Unfortunately, the wait to get into the actual "Guadi bit" was far too long, so instead we just walked around the open park space, but it was still lovely and the view of Barcelona was beaut. That night, we met up with Izzy to go and see the "magic fountains" and I have to say that this was probably my highlight. It probably sounds corny, but I´ve never seen fountains like it before. They changed colours, changed effects and music was playing alongside the "show". We also got soaked whilst at it, trying to take one of our many selfies with it in the background. Anyhow, it was a really good way to end a great day.

Cultural time for Sarah on Sunday and a trip to Barcelona´s big museum, the MNAC, which I kept accidentally calling the MCAT, causing the others to think that I was now into all that mcat jazz. I don´t think Vicky even noticed when I told her that we are going to the MCAT, it´s an easy mistake to make! It was cool, and definitely very different from the Prado in Madrid, with less portraits and less paintings of Christ. There was also a cool terrace on top of it, which again was great for a few cheeky snaps. Unfortunately that morning, we had also tried to go to this big food market, which from what I´ve seen pictures of is pick n mix heaven (my favourite thing everrrr), but it was closed for the puente darn it. On our way there we also encountered a grotesque old man who stopped in front of me and oggled at my (not even on display) boobs whilst moving his tongue around his mouth and making horrible sounds. Grim. Once again, I HATE Spanish men. We then joined Hannah and Becky for lunch in a sushi restaurant, right beside Barcelona´s Arc de Triomf. Izzy had kept mentioning this arc, and I was getting so confused thinking, I sweaaaar that is meant to be in Paris, but turns out, it´s just another wee one. 

I was really sad leaving on Sunday evening because I had had so much fun and Barcelona is just so cool....I might even prefer it to Madrid (!!!) ...did I just say that?! The city has so much character and there was so much to do. I struggled with the heat, of course, but that´s nothing new, and I think also there were a lot more toursits than there are in Madrid. But no, great few days and I´m glad I did it before I leave in a few weeks time!

DAY 151: El Finde

The weekend back home was awesome. I ate so much of Judith´s lovely home-cooked food, cuddled with dog, caught up with a couple of my friends and did A LOT of shopping. 

Thursday Night - Arrive in Edinburgh (after a horrendously slow boarding of the plane a la Spain) and get picked up by Mum. At home we proceed to drink a bottle of red wine and feast ourselves with food. So was not much different to my lifestyle in Spain.

Friday - Shopping. Again, something I´m quite keen on in España, the difference being this time that mumma is with me, aka...I wasn´t funding the expenses. Bought way too much stuff, and mostly all summer clothes, so the weather better pick up in Madrid soon! The rest of the day was filled with more eating (bread and Camembert - so again not really taking a break from the food in Spain) and Mum getting me to test a bed from one room to the other to see if "noises" can be heard. Yes, she wanted me to roll around and jump up and down to assess the slyness of having sex in it - don´t ask - all I can say is, it´s for particular guests that are coming, not for her and my father thank god. 

Saturday - A cheeky morning virgin cocktail with a friend (so so Chelsea) in Cent O Tre on George Street with a lot of chat about how things are, facebook stalking and gossip. A big lunch then of lasagne and cheese to follow with some family friends. Saturday night was a chilled one with the padres and I had almost forgotten how amusing (and sometimes irritating) it can be to watch tv with my father. As we watched "Take Me Out" Dad decided to rate each girl. "Paha no one´s going to pick that whale Clarissa" and when she did get picked "I don´t get it. I don´t get it." Such a charming father.

Sunday - A glorious roast for lunch - yes I´m obese ok - and then back to Madrid. Was pretty sad coming back actually and arriving back at my wee apartment all alone made me feel lonely...but I´ve already been back on the vino socialising again so things are back to normal (although work this morning isn´t too dandy).

I have a uni essay to write (in Spanish fml), a lot of laundry to do, a stack of dishes to wash and it´s still fucking raining, but apart from that, I will be doing more eating, more drinking, more "working" and my life in Madrid rolls on...

DAY 145: Estoy harta de España

Yesterday I was helping out at an event for people who claimed they had "too much money". Our business was to advise them on what they could invest their money in or spend their money on. As I arrived at 7.30am at the office, there to help out with the setting up as per usual, Mabel came up to me and said "So Sarah, do you have a boyfriend? There´s a lot of good looking rich men coming and you know, you could do well here". Bingo Mabel - you wise wise owl. Luckily, as it was an event, I was dressed smartly and had tried making an effort with some sexy (yet murderous) red heeled boots to top it off. These boots seemed a bit of a stupid idea later on in the day, as I ended up with blisters after walking to and from to and from to and from the meeting room with clients. Anyway, to my disappointment, all these men were really a bit too old for me....and married, so my dreams of being spoilt rotten with Michael Kors, fancy restaurants and romantic getaways went out the window. 

Apart from that, work has been pretty shit lately and I´m not enjoying myself as much as I was previously. I´m working with this girl Marta, who is lovely and all, don´t get me wrong, but she really is not the most interesting/logical/organised person to work with. My days are filled with checking bloody excel sheets against databases to make sure that all details of clients are correct and honestly, after doing about 2, I´m checking Facebook as a way to "interest" my life. It´s a shame because I liked Marta before, I´ve been out with her and she was very welcoming, but working with her is a whole different matter. This is why maybe its good not to "mix business with pleasure" - my social life and my life at work are two different stories.

I´ve also been ranting recently about Spain in general and how backwards I think the whole country is. Horrific timetables of businesses prove inefficient; the service industry cannot even compete with that of the UK (which only in comparison I have now noticed is much superior); men are sexist; and women are far from equal both socially and in the working world. There are a lot of other things that spring to mind, but I´ll save that for another day...

Living alone can be quite hard too. Yes, most of the time I like it, I can do what I want, have my own space, not care about washing up etc etc etc, but it does get lonely. It´s probably not the best idea that I spend my "lonely" time streaming episodes of 90210 instead of doing anything sociable or productive, but sometimes after work, I just get so tired (and fed up) that my wee bit of "relaxing time" turns into hours of tv, sleeping and eating. There´s a reason why I am getting so fat here! And socialising here, from my experience, consists mainly of drinking beer and nibbling on the free food they give you with it. Not that I´m complaining, I love my beer, but my belly really doesn´t and my professors back at uni most certainly wouldn´t either...

Anyway, fed up of all this, I have decided to go home this weekend, take a break from Spain and spend some time with the fam (and my dog...). Of course Mabel was fine with letting me off yet another day to go home early (she really is the most chillaxed boss) and my mum has been asking what I want in the fridge for when I get home (ahh Mummy you treat me well). Djibril (my dog) will be awaiting, and my Harry Styles cardboard cut-out from my 21st will be standing there beautifully. I´ll have the car and not be afraid to use it because of crazy Spanish drivers and my tv will be just a little bit bigger ;)..the only thing lacking is the beautiful Spanish sun - but I´ll be back in front of that next week (to "top up" my (very very fake) tan)!

DAY 139: Pedro

I had started to think that beautiful Pedro from when I first came to Madrid had forgotten me! I saw him when I first came and since then hardly ever. However, today as I was working on some boring excel with my ears completely blocked by blasting music from my headphones, Pedro appeared, beautiful beautiful Pedro, and naturally, I went all red. Either it´s the fact that he is just so handsome or my difficulty in understanding sexy Spanish accent, but literally my mind always fails me when I speak to him and he now thinks I´m a retard who still can´t speak Spanish after 5 months here. Anyway, being all charming (it is Valentine´s day after all ;) ), he invited me for dinner with him and his family. How lovely and very kind, but also, how awkward....let´s just say..things with his nephew, Alvaro, the fittie Hollister model from a while ago, did not end so well....*cough* asshole *cough*.  After Pedro left, you could see all the other girls giggling and smiling and then they all came up to me and asked "who is that Sarah?"...yes beautiful, beautiful Pedro is still well and truly "smokin hawt".

So I did something I hadn´t done in a while yesterday...I slept in through work! I thought those days were past me now that I am a mature 21-year-old, but sadly no. I knew I shouldn´t have been going out on Wednesday night in the first place but it was Sanderson´s friend´s last night in Madrid so something had to take place. Fair to say, the night did not end up so smoothly though....my neighbour now literally hates me and was buzzing on my door all day yesterday (of which I never answered because I´m too scared), I got into an argument, got punched, failed to make it to the club, got a taxi home which I couldn´t pay for and called my friend back home crying my eyes out...total mess. It´s times like that I just think, wow I´m an idiot, and that it really is time to cut back on the alcohol consumption. Saying that, I am going out tonight BUT I aim to just drink some beers...(come on, not not going to drink at all..).

So apart from a cheeky wee day off yesterday work has been pretty dire this week. My life is filled with boring databases and excels at the moment and the highlight this week, as always, has been getting the left over food from events - fat pig here. I´ve tried to be healthy, I really have, and I managed it up until Wednesday, but when Thursday came and that hangover was bangin, salad just wasn´t going to suffice.

Thank God it´s Friday though, and I plan on being a little more chillaxed this weekend. Also I´ve been thinking about the fact that if I hadn´t extended my job until June, this would be my last day, which just seems crazy. I don´t want to leave - I love it here! Viva Madrid.

DAY 98: España

Things I Love About Spain:

1. My Boss. Have I mentioned that? Mabel - beautiful Mabel with her strong Irish accent when she speaks English, her fashionable clothes, her long gorgeous dip-dyed hair and her general just making me feel welcome in the office. She even got a wee Christmas card from me today. I love Mabel.
2. Food. Apart from the obese Brit that I am now becoming, the food here is delicioso. Spanish Omelette (Tortilla) - O.M.G - just beautiful. I became obsessed for a while, every time my friends would text me I´d be like ´just chillin, eating tortilla´. It´s my new hangover cure and I am going to make myself learn the recipe so I that I can share my tortilla love with people back home.
3. Nightlife. The allure of free drinks always gets me. I don´t care if it´s sexist, when a free drink is offered to you, you take it. I love the reggaeton music, bumpin and grinding and salsa dancing, and the fact that on several occasions now I have been up with the DJ - much to their annoyance and my anger at none of them knowing who Cheryl is.
4. Fernando. My crazy and good-looking pal from work. Always rocking up in his baggy shorts, messy hair and tattoos, offering me shots of whisky and begging me to buy him a kilt. Crazy crazy Fernando, or "Fer" as everyone calls him, except I don´t like that so to me he is FERNANDO. What a name.
5. The 24 hour shop with my wee pal Carlos who knows me now and who thinks I am a drunken mess, lesbian with emotions. Nevertheless, he is always a friendly face when I stroll around the corner to that shop either drunk or hungover to buy tortilla, coke and cigarettes. 
6. Alcala. I´d never heard of Alcala de Henares before, but seeing as two of my close mates out here live there, I am there all the time - eating their food and drinking their vino. As my dad said to me this morning "you´re Spanish experience really only seems to be that you drink and eat a lot". Yes Dad, it is.
7. Slaw and Sanderson Wednesdays. I had to mention this as Sanderson got upset last time when I didn´t mention her in my blog. So on a Wednesday, we now have (a probably very lame) tradition of eating too much food and drinking too much wine together. Yes, this has left us with fatter bodies, horrendous hangovers, stupid photos and embarrassing moments but we always have fun being the immature Sarahs that we are. We´ve made friends (Carlos from the 24 hour shop and a few waiters in a restaurant WE CAN NEVER GO BACK TO.....my fault....) and we´ve spooned on a ridiculous amount of occasions. The Slaw and Sanderson love will never die.
8. The Sun. Yeah it´s colder, and it´s not exactly tropical, but really almost everyday there is sunshine and for a girl from Scotland, that´s pretty much THE LIFE.
9. Beer. I was a beer drinker back home but I now have even more of a soft spot for the local Mahou. As I embarrassingly drunkenly said on Spanish tv one night when they interviewing people on the street: "¿Por qué te gusta España?" (Why do you like Spain?) "Porque me encanta la cerveza!!!" (Because I love beer!). Oh Sarah...
10. El Corte Ingles. The Spanish version of John Lewis. I shop in it´s supermarket all the time (expensive as it is) and I rummage through the make up isles painting my hands with lipsticks and eyeshadows until I decide I can´t afford any of them and disappointing the leering sales staff.
11. My apartment. My "lad pad" as my friends call it. Can get lonely but really, it´s awesome. I like living alone, I can eat when I want and walk around naked, I don´t have to clean up straight away and I can sing to myself and not annoy other people (even though my friend Liz always gets a full earful whenever I´m with her - I know she loves it really - my rendition of Rihanna´s "Take A Bow" is just beautiful....
12. How chilled the Spanish are. Sometimes annoying and unorganised but pretty good for those days when I´m late for work or clearly hungover and they just don´t care. 
13. Siestas. I never used to sleep during the day because I would never be able to sleep at night, but now, I can´t go a day without a little snooze (or a 4 hour one like on Monday). My mum always knows when is sleeping time for me so makes sure she avoids a phone call then, and my friends here know that if I don´t reply to a text almost straight away (being the phone addict I am) I am most probably sleeping. What is my life. Lazy ass ho.

DAY 65: Los Coños

Life here is pretty awesome but I do have to rant a little about Spain and the Spanish.

1. MEN. Oh my God I HATE Spanish men. They are vile and disgusting perverts. They just think it´s acceptable to shout things at you in the street or hiss at you because you look foreign. It is so disgusting. I don´t really get what they expect you to do either. Is it like, "Oh!! You yelled at me on the street/from your car/in the shop/in a café...let´s just have sex RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW. I want you baby." Seriously, what do they expect? Am I meant to be flattered? It is horrible and makes me feel so cheap and scared. It really does suck being a girl. Mother´s tip for this one: wear a burkha.
2. SLOWNESS. I can´t get over how slow people do EVERYTHING here. It´s like a population of tortoises and snails. At work, they´ll give me a task, and I´ll do it, and they´ll be like "oh that was quick!" And I´m like, "err not really, how long does it take to stick a few labels on some envelopes?" If I ask to get something done, then like 2 weeks later it happens. In restaurants and cafés it´s bad as well. You will go up to the bar, wait whilst they chat to their friends, they´ll ask what you want, start making it, then go ask someone else what they want, then chat to their friends, then start making the other persons drink, then finish yours, then finish the other persons, then ask you for money, then serves someone else and then finally they take your money. I´m not a very patient person so this is all just pretty shit. 
3. MY LANDLORD. So I have never really dealt with my landlord, everything goes through this woman at work, who I have to say (is a bit of a retard). I am still yet to pay my rent bills for the two months I´ve been here and they just don´t seem to care. I have sent emails and emails asking how I pay, and all this woman emails me back with is the landlord´s name, useful? NO. I bumped into her the other day and I asked her again and she goes "what else do you need?" I´m like "what do you think I bloody need? You can´t send money over the internet via one name.." Eventually she sent me his details, but without a bill or anything and none of it makes any sense. Basically the jist of it all is is she´s a retard and he´s a retard and sucks for them being both retards because no money is flying anywhere their way....not that they seem to care..
4. WHY ARE SPANISH PEOPLE THIN? They eat so much. Breakfast before work (perhaps cereal or something), breakfast at work (muffin/pain au chocalat/churros), 3 course lunch, tapas (all fatty and fried). I mean seriously, I am really quite happy I cater for myself as I am on my way to becoming a whale.
5. TECHNOLOGY. Websites for gyms etc don´t have prices. Bank websites don´t have opening hours. You cannot get wifi in a house unless you have a landline. They sell cheap knock off chargers that don´t work with iPhones. The email system is way behind. As a bit of an obsessive with technology (especially with my mobile phone), I don´t like this.
6. RUDENESS. The Spanish are known for being slightly rude. I guess to themselves they are not rude, but to everyone else in Europe they seem rude. They find it funny that I say "please" and "thank you" all the time and think that I am so polite. They don´t say "will you do this?" or "would you do this please?". They just say do it. They speak in quite an aggressive manner. It took me a while to get used to this. At first I just thought everyone was just a cunt. Actually, that´s another thing...they swear ALL THE TIME. Now I´m not someone to lack in the swearing department but there´s a time and a place. They swear in schools, in the office, it wouldn´t surprised me if they swore in church. Literally, I was helping out at an important event a few weeks ago and one of the big boss men just entered the meeting going "qué coño"...translated as "what a cunt". No one batted an eyelash/eyelid (I can´t remember what that phrase is...awkward).
7. DRIVING. They can´t drive. Rich coming from me, but they can´t. They don´t indicate, they don´t stop at red lights and they just beep their horns. I´m surprised I haven´t died yet.

Rant over. Happy weekend all!

DAY 61: La Puta de la Oficina

Still at work! My first "full" Spanish working day. They work until 7pm waaah. (However, did get a nice big lunch in the cafe followed by some sunbathing outside the office with a few of the girls...so so Spanish!). It has been so busy up until now and I am pretty damn proud of myself. I was given a task on Friday to be completed today and it was quite technical and important because the big bosses would be reading it. Anyway I got it all done and Mabel checked it over and apparently I did a "fantastic job" #gome. The new girl didn´t help though. I´m becoming such a wee office bitch. We were initially meant to split the task but then she did it all wrong and I had to go over and correct it all...I mean geeeesss....it´s almost as if I have never been in that position.....

I can´t believe I´ve been here two months now! Cray cray. Time is flying by. And to think when I first came I literally hated this job and couldn´t do anything right....things have changed so much. I´ve also now been able to extend my job until June next year! So so so sooooo happy! Initially, I only had it until February and then I had to go and find another job elsewhere, which is pretty tricky in the current Spanish economy, especially without "Daddy" as a contact...

So the weekend was fun, and for once I wasn´t out getting shitfaced. I´ve been quite embarrassed lately as two people over the past week have both said that I am "like a child". So there´s my friend from uni who said I always just talk about "embarrassing myself when drunk" (which is true...) and then my friend here who said that I sing and get hyper too much. After years of thinking I was "older than my years", I´ve discovered that I really am just an immature 20-year-old...I have two months until I should probably start "growing up". ANYWAY, Liz and  I went shopping on Friday evening (that´s right, after complaining for two months about how I am so broke and going to be homeless soon, MY ERASMUS GRANT CAME THROUGH and I actually just feel so bloody rich!.....Bets on how long it lasts...2 weeks?) So yeah we went shopping and I bought a jacket, a t-shirt (in the sale at least) and lots of jewellery (and only cheap crap that makes my fingers green...would you really trust me with an 100 pound necklace...err no. (There are no pound signs available on a Spanish keyboard btw fyi). We then had a gorgeous dinner in a nice wee Spanish restaurant where I took my parents when they came. After finishing our meal and asking for our bill though, the charming waiter did not want us to leave, so invited us to a free glass of wine (I´m just irresistible, I know). After thaaaat, we then asked for the bill again when we were then offered a free shot. We gracefully declined (see, that´s me, growing up...). It was pretty evident they were trying to get us drunk.

In hysterics, Liz and I got the metro back to my flat where I just "tipsy-ly" sang and danced for her. She is a lucky girl eh? But the wine had kicked in making us sleepy by this point and so bed it was. I have a bit of a problem with wine. If I drink too much of it, I just don´t sleep well. So I slept for about 3 hours before waking up at 3am, amusing myself with Liz´s sleep-talking. It was this at this point, I decided to put on ma pod and have a wee boogie in the bed, waking Liz up with all my bootaaay-shaking. It was very strange, I literally felt like I was high or something. SO WIDE AWAKE. So this continued until 7am - not all "dance-floor fillers", I also went through an emotional I HATE MY LOVE LIFE phase with Adele and (this is cringe but, Demi Lovato)...and then through my "chill" playlist until I could finally feel myself getting tired. 

We went to Toledo the next day which is the old capital of Spain and it was really beautiful. There were cathedrals and a mosque and we even got to see the start of a Spanish wedding, which was pretty cool - not sure the bride was too happy with us gate-crashing though! By the end of the afternoon, however, we had gotten pretty bored, that was enough culture (and walking for the day). It was then back to Alcala for a night of X Factor viewing and movies.

Cristina made me YET ANOTHER fabulous lunch yesterday. I´m not really sure what it was but there was a meat in it that tasted a little bit like black pudding....nom..

I don´t have any plans this week :( However, I guess that is very Spanish and so I´m hoping something "spontaneous" will come up. Apart from that, might be planning a wee flat party. Show everyone my "pad". Or as my friends here call it, my "lad pad" because you know....just bring back sooooo many men don´t I.....naaaat. As I said to my brother drunkenly on Facebook about two weeks ago "I am not a slut Pat! Don´t worry your little sister is not a slut!"....rambling on....I don´t know why....about some "goings-on" in first year....oh dear Sarah, oh dear.

DAY 56: SCOTLAND

A few weeks ago I would have said that if I went home mid-way, I probably wouldn´t want to come back...however, I really do love it here so all is good. Home was nice though and I literally stuffed my face with roast pork, lasagne and whatever else Mother Hen had cooked for me....I think she secretly wants an obese child...It was a pretty chilled weekend with lots of cuddles from my lovely doggy and just a tad of shopping. I say "just a tad"...I now have no money. I thought my Erasmus Grant would come through yesterday....but it hasn´t...#financiallyfucked.

So I got back today and there was a girl sitting in my desk. I´m sorry, WHAT. Been here 2 months now..I have established my working area bitch. She´s the now new girl and was offered my desk, so now I´m sitting opposite her, hidden by a closet next to me so no one can see me...don´t know if that´s good or bad. Plus side, I can go on Facebook more easily (and write stupid stuff like this), but then it also now means I´m a complete loner. Geeees, just as I was starting to make ´work friends´....oh well. 

Not sure what plans are for this week apart from another party with the insurance lot, the crazy crew. You would never think people working in insurance would be that fun...I take that from my Dad who works in that sector....although saying that, he did get pissed on Saturday afternoon going to a football match with his uni mates ... "The Reekers" they call themselves...and then had to go to a dinner party afterwards, of which Judith (mother) was not impressed. Anyway yeah, drinks with them and then think I´m going to see the stage show of "The Lion King" in Spanish lol....love a wee a musical. 

Diet has started, bought a shit load of salad yesterday. However, I have decided not to count alcohol as let´s be honest, that´s not going to happen. 

Here´s to the next 6 weeks!

DAY 49: La Subnormal (Retard)

I really am quite a retard. I wish I could excuse this story with the fact that I was drunk or dancing or something but nope, I literally just tripped...I tripped and fell backwards into my glass coffee table, smashing right through it. Go me. Luckily I wasn´t too badly cut, just a bit of a slice on my leg which I carefully wrapped my towel round to stop the pulsing blood....so good at first aid me... I have really hurt my back though and went to the hospital yesterday to see if it was ok. I wasn´t entirely sure what they told me but I think I have fractured it or something...don´t really know what that means...and so I am on some strong pain killers. Woo! Missed work yesterday and literally spent the whole day in bed because when I stand up, it bloody hurts so much. Came into work today and really wish I wasn´t here but feel bad missing yet another day. I´M GOING HOME ON THURSDAY!!! YAYAYAYAYAYA :D So happy!! I get to see my beautiful doggy Djibril. He´s such a cutie. Funny how that´s the part I´m most excited about, yeah parents will be there and yeah home cooked food, but OMG MY DOG - I miss him so much. God I´m sad... Not much other news really. Been out a few times. Went to an awesome party last Wednesday actually, a Harper´s Bazaar VIP party if you will.....free cocktails....free manicure....free bottle of rum upon leaving....the new collection of Louboutins just you know, lying about......I felt like such an ugly mess though. There I was surrounded by stick-thin models and I stood there dumpy looking, attempting my best to look cool. I´m not cool, so that was quite a struggle. Saturday night was Lara´s birthday and was good fun, having a bit of a botellon in one of the plazas (drinking on the street) before heading to a club. I felt like a little underager hiding my beer as the policemen came to tell us off. We just replied ´NO HABLO SPANISH´and it seemed to work. Idiots. Diet is really going to start next week (can´t be this week...I´m going home, and knowing my mum, she is going to stuff me with home cooking til I can hardly move). So next week! Joining a gym (Erasmus grant should FINALLY be coming in thank God!)....and banning myself from cheese, bread and tortilla....If I am not looking bloody hot by December 22nd (special wee party going on then ;) ), I will be so disappointed. JUST DO IT SLAW.

DAY 41: La Lesbiana

You wouldn´t think it, but the insurance lot really are so funny. I work in Marketing so I don´t actually work with them, which is probably quite good seeing as I tend to make a tit out of myself most of the time I´m with them. Just speaking to a girl named Marta on the internal office chat, who I met on Friday night , I go "Yeah I always feel so stupid when I´m around you guys," she replies "No. We are a curious group because all of us work in the financial world in the Big 4, investment banks or doing a phd related to this....freaks. We work hard in very stressful jobs and that´s why we drink and smoke more than what is recommended, it is our way out, and after the first shisha and a few beers later, we have the IQ of a chicken." It made me laugh. She´s cute. She really is a funny character actually. On Friday she was telling me about how it doesn´t matter if you have sex with someone ugly because you can just turn the lights off and imagine someone else! She said she was joking when she said she imagines Pedro (remember BEAUTIFUL Pedro the big boss man from the first week) when having sex with her boyfriend, but I don´t actually think she was.... Anyway, on Friday night it was Tono´s farewell party and my classiness was truly thrown out the window. I didn´t think I had drunk that much when all of a sudden I started feeling sick. However, I was still "aware of what I was doing" let´s just say, and so I took this moment to go to the bathroom and tactically...you know what. I´m a grim person. However, it worked, I could continue on drinking and the next day, I DIDN´T HAVE A HANGOVER! Fabz fabz fabz. I´m sure I don´t give off a very good impression on these blogs but I don´t really care, I´m 20, Scottish and in Spain.... 

I went to Alacalá on Saturday and vegged out with Liz in front of several "fantastic" films. The first being, The Bling Ring, would recommend but is kind of weird and can´t believe it´s a true story. The second, Despicable Me 2, although sadly we didn´t get to see the end because of stupid streaming sites. The third one was, The Hunchback of Notre Damn. I don´t even remember watching it as a child but I don´t think it should be classed as children´s film....it´s so mean. Poor wee Quazimodo! What´s also embarrassing, is that I actually thought it was a true story up until that point, when I told Liz and she just looked at me like "what you on about?". That night, Liz really got lucky. We were sharing her bed and she said that 80% of the night I was trying to spoon her in my sleep and kept putting my leg over her as though she was my boyfriennd. Clearly my subconscious is telling me something....I´m sure she enjoyed it though...I mean who wouldn´t, I´m a very sexy person..... :/ There was also one point where somehow all the duvet and sheet was wrapped around me and I was trapped for about 5 minutes like a sauasage trying to unravel myself. It was quite a scary experience. I probably just shouldn´t share bed with people. Should probs just become a nun.

On Sunday, Sanderson came round and yet again Cristina cooked us all a lovely lunch, with lots of wine and sex chat of course. Cristina really does make me laugh, on the one side she is motherly and caring and on the other side she is just a hilarious and horny woman. I do love her a little bit. We then all went to smoke some shisha in a cool wee hippie café. We were all so relaxed when leaving that I just couldn´t be bothered getting back on the train.

I had to sit in on a 3 hour long conference today on the exciting topic of Taxes...life today was riveting.

DAY 34: La Patata

I mentioned in a previous blog that when the other girls were dancing on the bar, I refrained, as to save people´s eyes. However, things change. On Friday night Rosie and I found ourselves up on the air above everyone, acting as though we fucking ruled the club. We also hopped on a podium thing and no one would dare even ask us to come down because yeah, we were fucking awesome ;) All in all it was a very good night, drinking almost an entire bottle of vodka between us, stealing shots at the bar and dancing away until it was time for a much deserved pizza slice! We arrived back at the flat (with Andrew) at about 3.30am (far too early for España) so continued to drink until we decided Mean Girls was all of a sudden a good idea :/ Munching away on doritos and salsa and a pizza I tried cooking in the microwave that literally turned black and tasted vile, we all lay in bed, laptop in front of us and loaded Mean Girls. Rosie and I woke up about 11am - Andrew was gone, the bed covered in crumbs and the titles of Mean Girls playing on my laptop...neither of us remembered watching any of it...pretty sure we all just passed out, oops. 

So you would think that as I had a friend to stay we would be proactive in doing touristy things, sight-seeing, walking, exploring the city...ok we did go and get some tapas (being all ´cultural´ and all) but really we spent most of the next day watching episodes and episodes of Breaking Bad. Yes, I am only JUST getting into it...so please stay hush! Saturday night involved slobbing in front of the tv even more, watching The X Factor and gorging on cheese. Sunday was shopping day! I say shopping day when in actual fact we only went to one shop, Sephora, spending so much time painting lipsticks and eyeliners on our hands and buying much more than we should have. For some reason I bought this sparkly fake tan that you can also put in your hair to make it ´sparkle´. Not such a great idea, my hair is not sparkly but instead a greasy, sticky mess...good thinking Sarah! We had a pizza for lunch and then decided to fat ourselves up even more by ordering a chinese for dinner. Seriously, I feel like I need to get liposuction! Diet starts today! 

So all in all it was a pretty fun weekend. Great chat and gossip (what else would you expect from two girls who haven´t seen each other for a few months), lots of wine, a lot of dancing (we were still complaining about our aching legs yesterday....we just worked our bootays so hard) and a lot A LOT of food. I am officially a potato.

DAY 30: El Vino

Had such a lovely day yesterday. After work I went to Alcala again and had yet another beautiful lunch at Liz's house. Her flatmate, Cristina, makes the most amazing food. There was chicken, chorizo, chickpeas in salsa, bread, olives, black pudding (kind of)..just so much...and it was soooo good. Of course a lot of red wine was consumed as well, along with gin and tonics, beer, and a cava milkshake! Of course, yet again, I am hungover. 

So of course being in Spain, we had lunch about 4pm and we were joined by Sarah (now referred to as Sanderson, and me Slaw) and Cristina's work colleague, Pablo....(such a typical Spanish name). A lot of good chat over dinner and later on a game of 'Never Have I Ever'.....playing this with an older woman who I swear has done everything..was good craic. 

At work today I had to envelope tonnes and tonnes of letters and then address them all, really pretty boring but at least I didn't have to deal with people in my hungover state. Literally, I arrived to work (straight from Alcala as I stayed at Liz's) in yesterday's tights, a smelly t-shirt, contacts slept in, greasy hair and make up on from the night before...I'm literally going to be known as the office skank! Ah well! Of course I had a siesta this afternoon and now I am preparing myself for a weekend of 'banter' with my pal Rosie who is visiting me....YAYA! 

DAY 19: Alcala

It's quite reassuring when a Spanish person asks you for directions. It's especially satisfying when you know exactly where they need to go and you can say it in Spanish. Get in Slaw!

If I cancel out Friday (my day of rest), in which I slobbed in my pyjamas and watched shit tv all day 'recovering' from the night before, I had a pretty good weekend. Surprisingly today, my boss didn't mind that I had missed work. My lie of being ill was so obvious but yet no comment was made - phew! If you think about it, I was actually ill, it was just my immature self that had made me that way....sangria...whisky....beer...gin.....ANYWAY, on Saturday I went to Sol to try and find a bank. Nope still don't have a bank account, and nope, there were no banks open. Really don't know what I'm going to do :/. So as I was strolling through Sol, across the road I saw this couple who I recognised. I had to double-take because it would be so random that they would be in Madrid this time of year and that I would bump into them, but it was them, it was my friend Fee's parents. I ran over to them and I have to say it was quite comformting having someone I actually knew in Madrid, and they took me for a coffee which was really nice. After that, Lara and I went shopping and found our new favourite shop, Pimkie. It's such good value for such nice clothes. Saying that, I went into the changing room with about 10 items and came out with 2 - I am so hard to please, I never like things on me! Plus, bank balance really isn't too healthy at the moment what with being an unpaid intern! Anyway, got myself a wee jumper and a sort of kimono thing, really don't know if that's cool or not? That's me, trying to be 'edgy' and all that...

I wish I was at San. Bernabeu on Saturday night to watch the Atletico v Real game. I only live 5 minutes away!!! I ended up watching it in a bar anyway with Alvaro, which was still good fun. However, I do have to admit, I am one of those girls who pretends she is into football when really she has no idea what is going on....so....I always say I support Liverpool, just because my Dad and brother do - Stevie G right?! - and on Saturday with Alvaro he asked me who I was supporting, and I just go 'oh yeah I follow Real Madrid'. Excuse me, you 'follow Real Madrid' Sarah?! Name any of their recent matches. The only thing I can say is, I know who Christian Bale is....oops....Gareth I mean!..Gareth Bale! :P Anyway, as an Atleti fan, Alvaro was not too impressed, but it was fun even still.

On Sunday I got the train to Alacala de Henares, which is a cute wee town 40 minutes north of Madrid. There I met a new friend, Liz, who is friends with someone I know from home. Small small world! I had a really nice afternoon with her and the Spanish lady who she lives with, who is really kind of crazy. She seemed to love talking about sex (fits perfectly with me ;) ) and she was teaching us all these dirty phrases...how useful! She also made this A-M-A-Z-I-N-G lunch and I was so so full afterwards. It got to about 5pm and I realised I was fairly tipsy as well what with all the wine and beer she supplying me with - I just find it too hard to say no! Later that day, I met up with Sophie, who is trying to find an apartment there. We went for a few drinks with her friends before it was time for me to really think about going home, what with bloody work the next day!

So here I am in my wee apartment, and it is absolutely pouring outside - I did not ask for this - I moved AWAY from Scotland! Not sure what plans I have this week but no doubt it will include cerveza, cigarillos, baile, duermo, divertido y un poco más sol!!! (For you non-linguists: BEER, CIGARETTES, DANCING, SLEEP, FUN and A LITTLE MORE SUNSHINE) ;)