So after deciding to go on a very spontaneous holiday to Valencia for the weekend, we booked a car, booked a hostel and I faked tanned til my skin was orange - bring on the sun! I met Andrew and his flatmate, Margarida, along with two Greek people I didn't know and we headed to the car rental place, carrying bags of clothes, food and alcohol. On our way there we came across a traffic jam literally caused by a couple who had decided to stop in the middle of the road, put on their hazard lights and make out passionately in the front of the car, not even joking...they must be some seriously horny people.
As we started on our journey, Andrew wapped out this massive tank of mojito he had made along with plastic coffee cups with lids (sensible so that they don't spill in the car) and straws - perfection. We had probably passed about 15 minutes before I was on my third, much to the Greeks disbelief. You could see their faces wondering who these drunken Scottish people were. The car journey took a few hours, with me being the "dj" plugging in my ipod to the car, much to everyone's satisfaction I'm sure. Andrew and I got progressively more pissed as the others stayed sober and kept asking to stop the car so that we could both pee and smoke, such great people to travel with! We eventually arrived in Valencia at about 2am, where we had now missed check in and had to wait outside for someone to come and open up. Andrew and I were so desperate to go out at this point that we considered just changing and sleeping in the car, but then the fitty hostel man (who we couldn't work out how he was fit - he was bald) arrived and all was dandy. The Greeks and Magarida weren't too keen on going out, so Andrew and I abandoned them and hailed a cab of the main road. We just asked him to take us to a good and popular club and he was very wise with his selection as it was freaking awesome.
Part of the club was open air and then inside was all white with fit girls in sequined swimsuits dancing on podiums. We danced away, picking up masks as we went (it's the weekend of the Brazilian festival Carnaval) and drank more and more until the early hours, with perhaps a tactical chunder in between. Leaving the club at 6.30am, we unsuccessfully tried to google map our hostel and ended up walking for a good hour (although I must admit that part of that journey I was actually getting Andrew to push in me a shopping trolley we had found on the street). We got home at 8am, when it was already daylight, and crashed until about 12pm, trying not to wake the others up.
So of course the next morning (or afternoon, whatever) Andrew and I were in desperate need of food, so after watching the Carnaval fireworks in the main square, all of us went for a big lunch of paella and just a splash of beer. It was pretty evident to Andrew and me though that the Greeks were more interested in doing the cultural stuff, whilst Andrew and I just wanted to die. So we went our separate ways for a few hours, doing a bit of walking, a bit of mask shopping and ending up of course in an Irish pub. The beer there was rancid, but determined to get drunk again, we forced ourselves with a couple of pints, before finding ourselves sleepy and needing to go back to the hostel for a siesta. I didn't actually sleep, which was a bit shitty as later in the night I just could not hack anything. My belly was bloated and we were literally walking round the bars in Valencia with masks on and what I felt like a pregnant stomach. We did meet up with the Greeks and Margarida at this point, but it was clear by now that our conversations just didn't "flow". As we all arrived back at the hostel the Greeks were going on about this ancient Roman town they wanted to see as we left Valencia. Obviously, being the uncultural messes we are, Andrew and I were not pleased with this, so we suggested they got up at about 9 and went and did it and then we would all go the beach at lunchtime before our long journey back to Madrid. They agreed to this...
Well....the next morning we woke up at 10am and everyone was still in bed. Check out was at 11am and the Greeks (like they had been all weekend) were so slow at getting themselves out. As we eventually got into the car, Theo, the guy, said he would google map the beach, we didn't have time now to go to the Roman town - thank God. Well, the sly little fucker that he was gooogle mapped the Roman town instead of the beach and so took us the wrong way. How cheeky. We were passing a sign at a roundabout for the beach when Margarida said "Theo are sure it's not that way?" At this point Theo said, "See I would quite like to go to the Roman town so thats where I've been giving directions to." I was not impressed. I could feel my inner bitch coming out. "We agreed we would all go to the beach though because of the time" I said, and you could see Theo's face just bubbling with anger. I would not back down though, I was being a right dick to him and I didn't even care - it was sunny, I was tired and hangover and I never get to go to the beach. "But is there something special at the beach?" Antonia, the Greek girl asked and I was just like, err don't get all cultural and intelligent with me missy...(I didn't actually say that.) ANYWAY, what happened was we split up, the Greeks went to the Roman thing and the three of us went to the beach and it was sooo much fun and so nice and hot. We then pied out on tapas and ice cream, chilled in the sunshine and then headed back to meet them (and they were late - of course).
The journey home was dull, and after just 15 minutes of my music (even though I refrained from playing One Direction and Cheryl Cole) Theo abruptly asked if we could switch to his ipod. Eurgh. Now judging on appearances I was pretty sure we would be listening to some sort of heavy rock, Theo is long haired and pierced, he then proceeded to play song after song of Greek Eurovision songs! Wtf. Come on, a bit of Miley Cyrus and Will.i.am is better than that shit, no? He was bopping away and so was Antonia, so Andrew and I bitchyly put in our headphones. The journey ended with Margarida's music.
Anyway all in all it was a fantastic weekend. I now feel dead and disgusting and have some how hurt my leg and I think I have broken my toe. Oops!
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